Fear Factor

I think I just faced my biggest fear EVER today. Or at least registered myself to face it. Yep, today I registered myself at the hospital where I’m going to deliver Cosmo Baby in 15 weeks from now…. GACK! The baby has to come out? This is suddenly a reality for me. Pregnancy I can handle, running a personal worst I can handle, labour I can handle – but motherhood? Oy! I don’t think that I thought this through enough! Can I turn back now?

I know it’s a bit late to turn back time – but it never seemed so real and inevitable until this afternoon. I know what you’re thinking – dumb blonde… I know I’ll get through it – I get through everything life throws at me – but this? This is suddenly scaring the shit outta me. Not because I don’t think I can do it, but because I want to do a damn good job at it. Oh I hope I can be as good a mom as my mom was.

Does anyone have any good parenting tips to share with me? I’d love to hear them – maybe it’ll help to put my mind at ease…

13 thoughts on “Fear Factor

  1. We are expecting number 2 soon. It’s not quite as scary the 2nd time but there are still unspoken fears.

    You are going to be fine. Look around you. There are many people who are parents, some good, some bad. But if they could do it then you certainly can.

    Advice? Depends on the month/stage. Early:
    Before arrival stock up on frozen foods, quick prepare meals, etc. Load up the fridge. Seriously.

    Get an infant first aid kit together.

    Get the nursery/room ready.

    Read What to Expect When You Are Expecting and What to Expect the First Year. (both conversational and very informative)

    Read Supernanny. (an easy read)

    Read Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child. (good resource)

    Upon arrival:
    Sleep when the baby sleeps. This is harder than it sounds. Dishes can wait, laundry can wait. Rest cannot.

    It may be hard at times but cherish, cherish the moments. They will pass too quickly and soon your little snuggly one will be off and running independently. We don’t get those little hugs and kisses so often now because our 2 yo is just running around like crazy. As it should be. But I miss those 2 am feedings, the quiet solitude, the bonding. Remember those times, even when it is hard.

    But rest.

    You are going to be a great mom. Just know that.

  2. People will give you tips, ideas, suggestions. From breastfeeding to CIO to co-sleeping. The best parenting tip I can give is to take everyone’s advice with a grain of salt and do what suits you best. Don’t compare your child to anyone else. If they take longer to crawl, turnover, walk, talk, that’s okay.

    It’ll be the best and worst time. :smile: You’ll be great.

  3. I so remember that feeling when it hit me that the baby had to come out. I was induced with my first, and spent hours trying to convince nurses that I was completely OK with being pregnant, and he could just stay in. Indefinitely, really.

    All of the advice above is good. My aunt told me this, and it’s always stuck with me. You and CosmoBoy are chosen to be this baby’s parents. So whatever it takes, you’ve already got it in you. My only other bit is to make an effort to meet other young new moms. Join a group or something if you don’t have any in your own social circle. They are such a lifeline that you will value for a long, long time. I got sick of hearing from my mom’s generation that everyone was potty trained at 11 months … I much preferred to talk things through with people in the boat with me.

    You’ll be GREAT!!

  4. I remember feeling the exact same way!! That sudden realization is scary. But you’ll do just fine. And my advice…follow your instincts. I know you’re probably saying, “What instincts?” at this point, but trust me on this one. You’ll hold that baby in your arms and they’ll kick in.

  5. Number one: when you go into labour do not be afraid to take the epidural. No it does not affect baby’s wanting to feed, etc. as I have been told. As soon as I got to the hospital the doctor asked me if I wanted anything for the pain. I said yup I’ll take the epidural. He said, “when?” I said, As soon as possible”. My DS came out looking for my boob with his mouth going strong. You don’t get a metal for doing labour “naturally”. Once you get baby home and when he/she turns 2 you may want to do a return on this little person. Well I’m sorry to say you can’t. It’s a tough road being a parent and you just have to take it one day at a time. Read some books, watch some of the Supernanny programs and use the information you and your hubby think will work. One important thing is you and your hubby have to be team. Don’t worry you’ll do it. You will be a great parent even though some days you will question yourself. Oh ya when someone tells you that your mothery instinct kicks in immediately after baby is born is a bull shitter. When I had my dd, it took two weeks for it to kick in. I will give you once piece of advice for getting baby to sleep. Do not lay down with baby or put baby in a swing to get her/him to sleep. A very bad habit to get into. Baby should never depend on anyone or anything to get to sleep. I tell you this to make your life a lot easier. Anyways, I’ll shut up now. You’ll be a great mom Marie!!


  7. I thought of another tidbit that a home care nurse told me. Even if you’re feeling great after the baby is born, put a bathrobe by your door, and put it on everytime you answer the door to yet another well-wisher coming to coo at your new little person. People are nice to people in bathrobes: they’ll do your laundry, wash your floor, bring you food. Stay with the bathrobe! 😉

  8. Just try to enjoy it all. Even the bad stuff. It’s gone so fast, and we only get to do this a limited times in our life.

    Use your gut instinct. Use your mom’s advice. Everyone is different, don’t think you’re not up to par because you don’t follow someone else’s way of doing things. It’ll all fall into place.

    I broke many of the rules listed up comments, but Kaitlyn turned out a-ok.

  9. The head end goes up, and the butt end goes down. Lots of hugs and you’ll do fine. :)

    Nobody will know your baby better than you and your husband. What works for others may not work for you at all. Do what feels right for you and the baby. Inevitably, someone will spot you doing something and say “Oh, we never do that!”, your reply should be “That’s because you didn’t have my baby, you had yours.”

    Just follow what feels right and you will do fine.

  10. WOW ❗ Good advice from everyone. I unfortunately have no kids, except for my bunny and hamster, and therefore unable to give you advise. I will tell you this though – you will be an awesome mommy ’cause you had (have) an awesome mommy. You couldn’t have asked for a better role model :smile:

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