Since I’m participating in Dotcomdud’s reader challenge, I’ve asked one of my nearest and dearest friends, Michelle of MEGO: My Eyes Glaze Over to guest post for me. Michelle absolutely understands me and my love of all things social media in a way that no one else can. Afterall, she’s a digital maven and mom! She’s also smart, funny and an awesome mom too! If her blog isn’t on your reader list, it should be!
Now That There are Two…
There are many common questions asked of new moms. As I recall the most popular one when I had my first boy was "Is he sleeping through the night?" (Answer: of course not!). When I had my second four months ago the most frequently asked question by moms and non-moms alike:
Are you finding it harder having two?
I believe that they want you to go on about the new gray hairs you have found, the mess your house has become, the incredible stress you find yourself in at bath time/meal time/go-out-the-door time, and the state (or lack of) of your manicure. Everyone loves a car wreak, don’t they?
Yes, grocery shopping is miserable with a baby and pre-schooler in tow, and there is no room in the cart for groceries. And, yes, getting out the door takes time, planning, and patience. Entertaining the elder, while breastfeeding the younger is always a challenge and you might as well forget about the "only one hour of TV" rule. Yet, I will argue I that it isn’t harder having two. Rather, I ask myself, rather regularly – "Gee, I had it good when I only had the one – what was I so stressed about?"
When it is your first you are paranoid you are going the fail "Mommy 101". You sanitize everything three times, you refuse to give the baby a bottle for the first 6 months for fear of "nipple confusion", you count and record the number of times you feed them (for how long, and which boob), you count poops, pees, and the number and duration of every "nap". You try every trick to get them to sleep (at night; longer; in their own bed; and by themselves), you know exactly how old they are (to the day), and how much they weigh (right now). In general, with the first you work very hard, worry constantly, and fear that the tough stuff will never end.
With the second: You realize that eventually they will sleep (the sleepless nights aren’t forever), that the bottle of breast milk won’t likely confuse the baby and will give you a moment of sanity, that the chart of feedings, poops and pees is not only unnecessary but a lot of work that your brain can do on its own, and that someday they will go to sleep without you feeding, rocking, or singing them to sleep. Unfortunately, there will be a stab of guilt every time someone asks you how old they are and you stammer as you count back the months.
With the second you relax because you know there is no test, and in a moment that crying baby will be saying to you: "I don’t like that, Mommy", "No, thank YOU!", "Don’t talk to me like that" and giving you the three-year old pout. And, boy isn’t that more fun?
PS – today is blog comment day. The rules are simple. You must comment on five blogs, and two blogs must be blogs that you have never commented on before. That’s it!