I got an email last week from a friend:
Well, I did it. I bought a bathing suit. My first one in, oh, 12 years! Yikes.
Any one else feeling a little shy about wearing bathing suits in public?
I kinda wish I was pregnant so I’d have a valid excuse for having a tummy. Instead, I shake my fist at Shamrock Shakes and Easter chocolate.
I’ve been really thinking about her email a lot this past week. You see, as a mom to two daughters I really have to be careful about the messages I send to them. Being the same sex as them, I know that they’ll look up to me and learn from me. I want my girls to be confident women and comfortable in who they are, not who society tells them they should be. Her email made me think about my relationship with my body and also my relationship with bathing suits.
You see, I can’t think of a single article of clothing that is more truthful than the bathing suit. It doesn’t hide anything. It doesn’t lie – all of our flaws are out there for the whole world to see. But are they really flaws? Who says they’re flaws? Who says we aren’t supposed to have cellulite, spider veins, stretch marks, flabby bellies, love handles, back fat, moles etc…? Where did we learn that from? Our first social cues come from our parents, right? So this is where I come in – if I want my girls to be confident in their bodies, then I have to be too. I’ve decided that everyone looks good in a bathing suit, myself included. I will wear my suit along with my cellulite, spider veins and stretch marks proudly. My girls don’t know what looks good and what supposedly doesn’t. All they know is that they like swimming, and they like swimming with mommy and daddy. I don’t intend to introduce them to what "looks good" ’cause I truly believe the thing that looks best on everyone is confidence. Next week, when I swim with my girls I will strut my stuff proudly and be the role-model I want to be for them. Florida here we come!
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Good for you – there’s no better gift you can give them. Confidence is so lacking in our young women.
I feel that way too! I love to swim with my little guy and he doesn’t care at all. I hope his sister grows up not caring. He calls my stretch marks and c-section scar “Mommy’s owies.”
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I don’t know you, but this entry makes me feel there is hope. Good on you for being that strong momma for your girls to look up to. So many daughters learn to be judgemental and body-phobic from their mommas. You, my friend, should be commended for your good example!! Not only for your daughters either, but for all mommas!
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Good for you. Summertime is the time to let it all hang out. And speaking for men everywhere, thank you for sharing. Assuming it is men’s opinions you are concerned about, stop worrying because we’re very forgiving little pervs. If you are worried about women whispering about your defects behind your back, then I don’t know what to tell you. Fart at them, I guess.
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You go girl! I’ve always wondered about those anti-cellulite ads that say 95% of woman are plagued by it – ummm… if 95% of women have it may be we should accept it as NORMAL and stop wasting energy trying to eradicate it!
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I’m only in my 20′s and lucky to have made it thus far with a decent body…well fine I used to be chunky, but I’ve worked hard! My actual point though, I have friends who aren’t in such great shape and they don’t think twice about sporting a bikinni, they are living their lives for them and no one else. They are happy, confident strong women and I hope to grow up and be like them. It’s a great message to send your children.
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I really believe a lot of this started with magazines airbrushing their pictures, and we started thinking real people could look that way!
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This is soo true! I dread the bathing suit reality this summer as well. But you are so right about wanting to send the right image to our daughters. I don’t ever harp on weight with them even though I am thinking it or dieting. They know nothing of my frustration with my not eating well or exercising as much as I should cause I want them to be comfortable with themselves as they grow. I used to never have trouble with my weight until recently and now I cannot seem to get back to my ideal weight (who can). Anyway, I will wear my bathing suit no matter what size I am come summer even if I am not happy about it and they will not know any different.
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I could not agree more. I want to be a good role model for Becca too. SO I am trying to take care of my body and not show my own body image issues. Awesome post mama!
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